ONE MORE NIGHT

“Hope is the ability to hear the music of the future.

Faith is the courage to dance to it today."

- Peter Kuzmic -

Tuesday, February 21, 2023

It's been a rough two days. I was pretty good at remaining

positive and upbeat since knowing the date of surgery #2. Sadness has managed to consume more and more of my days leading up to Wednesday. I'm sitting in the sh!t, allowing my body to experience the weight of uncertainty and annoyance at what I was hoping to be the week before my radiation. Instead, it's a second surgery to try and obtain clear margins followed by another round of post-op recovery and recuperation.

(To get the deets on what clear margins mean and more info on how this second surgery came about, click HERE.)

Even though I am trying hard not to worry about "what if my margins aren't clear after this surgery," I have allowed myself to briefly acknowledge that the potential for a third surgery exists and so far, I've resisted going down the rabbit hole any further.

The ebb and flow of emotions continue and I suspect will keep me from getting a solid night's sleep and I'm ok with that. I will rest and meditate and practice all the relaxation techniques. Deep breaths, peppered with a few tears. That's ok.

It's a lot. It really is a lot.

What makes it easier is knowing that this is step #2 in this journey, a necessary step in this process of ridding me of the cancer cells so I can keep living my amazing life. This surgery is needed as part of Kicking Cancer to the Curb!

I sit in gratitude for all my love-humans who life me up during this uncertain time, for sending cards, notes, texts, support, funnies, emails, love and food.

And I am so grateful for my oncology team who are bringing it with all their hearts and expertise. TOGETHER, WE ARE KICKING CANCER TO THE CURB!!