LIFE DETOURS

RC
Aug 21, 2023
3 min read

“And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow.”

- Gilbert Chesterton -

AUGUST 21, 2023

The last 2+ months have been a whirlwind.

In early June, a few days after my last blog post, I was feeling more and more like myself. The cumulative effects of radiation (skin blistering and fatigue - oh gosh the FATIGUE!) were starting to fade. I had hopes of a restorative summer ahead with the return to my life, plans for the next steps in my business and officially being a Breast Cancer Thriver!! WOOOHOOOOOO!!

Then, life took an unexpected turn.

On June 8, our family received some very difficult news. My father has cancer. WTF?!

My Dad had been exhibiting some symptoms that required a colonoscopy. On that same day, we were asked to join the doctor in the consultation room. I knew what that meant and I didn't want to go into THAT room. F@%&!

Having just been on the other side of my own cancer journey, I couldn't believe we were about to embark on another one - this time for my 89-year-old Dad. They found a peach-size tumour that was presenting as colorectal cancer. Are you F@%&N KIDDING ME?!

Processing. Processing. Processing.

Then the twist... the pathology report indicated that the cells were actually prostate cancer. Huh?! My father had his prostrate removed in 2001, but alas a few cells remained and here we were, trying to figure out this medical puzzle and what to do about it.

Head first into the rabbit hole of medical tests, MRIs, CT Scans, countless doc appointments, phone calls and emotional roller coaster rides. Waiting, waiting and then the game plan set into motion.

So for the past two and a half months, I have been holding my breath, hoping and praying that my Dad could get through this and become a cancer thriver, just like me.

It's been really really heavy - for me, my Mom, our family. My dear Dad. The stress. The worry. The fear. It's been a shit-load and then some!

THE GOOD NEWS... my Dad's tumour is shrinking and the prognosis is good. The medications and injections have been doing their thing. Thank you modern medicine. The tumour is shrinking!! Hallelujah! Radiation will begin in either October or December. Full of gratitude.

It's been, well, overwhelming. Day after day, since that consultation room meeting, I found myself retreating and truly unable to deal with much else except the absolute minimum. Some days (many days) were spent horizontal and emotionally exhausted. I was still processing my own cancer journey and managing family stuff on top of my Dad's cancer. Plus a myriad of other circumstances that have just added to it all. It's been A LOT.

So I checked-out. I did what I had to do and everything else was put on hold.

I became a virtual recluse, stopped posting on social media, had little connection with friends, and tried to find respite whenever I could. It's been a mental struggle. I could only manage the absolute minimum on what I needed to do and spent the rest of my energy trying to crawl out of a dark hole.

And here I am...breathing again and slowly unfurling.

I'M FINALLY ON THE UPSWING!