GOODBYE 2022

Saturday, December 31, 2022

Summation of the past year...

WALKING INTO 2022

STRUT, STRUT

DOING ALL THE THINGS

💥BREAST CANCER BOMB💥

I'm FINE...

As I think about the new year ahead and what 2023 holds for me, I'm experiencing a roller coaster of feelings. In past years, I'd be reflecting positively (even during Covid) upon the last 12 months and making plans for the coming 12. This year, well, it's different. It weighs heavy especially compounded by the year that was 2020, followed by the deja vu of 2021 and now the crap-down of 2022...

When the breast cancer bomb hit in early November, I made the conscious decision to not let cancer suffocate my day-to-day. It was a choice and a commitment I was going to keep until January 1, 2023.

On this New Year's Eve, CANCER has moved up the priority list to the number one spot. It's all cancer all the time around here now - it's the lens through which all my decisions are being made: "Is this supportive to me in my cancer journey?" Yes? Great, keep. No? Either defer or eliminate.

My word for 2023: ELIMINATION.

Getting rid of everything and anything that doesn't support me or the life I want to have, including the elimination of the cancerous cells in my left boob!

Queue reality check: part of my left breast will be removed. As I bid farewell to 2022, I'm wrapping my head around what it will be like to bid farewell to a part of my body. I'm constantly cupping my left breast wondering what it will feel like post-lumpectomy. I'm spending countless mornings looking at myself in the mirror, looking down at my chest and wondering what the change in my mammary landscape will look like. I'm processing.

I believe cancer has landed at my door for a reason, the alternative of looking at cancer's arrival as a curse is not helpful so I make the choice to welcome whatever processes or self-awareness comes with this human journey.

Here's to 2023 and all the good stuff it will bring!

11 more sleeps...