FINDING BLISS

"Nothing is more important than reconnecting with your bliss. Nothing is as rich. Nothing is more real."

- Deepak Chopra -

Sunday, April 23

These last two days have been noticeably quiet and unscheduled. And it has been wonderful!!

I woke up this morning feeling absolutely yummy. You know those mornings when you have had a really good night's sleep and you are in a complete state of bliss? This morning was one of those mornings. I haven't felt this good in ages. I truly am in a state of bliss. No worries or anxiety over my breast cancer. No appointments or scheduled events. My calendar is absolutely bare. And the sun is shining!

We had plans to open up the summer retreat this weekend, but I miscalculated when the water would be turned on. I wanted to have an early start to the season so that when the typical radiation side effects of fatigue, skin irritations and discomfort set in, we could pop out to the lake and just enjoy being away and taking a break. The change in plans allowed for a completely free weekend, which quite frankly, is a true gift!

I tend to have a lot in my calendar - lately there have been daily rad treatments, medical appointments, my weekly HEALTh program spinkled with scheduled "joys" as well - shows in Stratford, taking in the cherry blossoms, catch-up-athon with friends, birthday celebrations, U10 AA hockey game playoffs (they won the GTHL Championships!) and other stuff too. But not this weekend. Two full days of NOTHING.

And that is when a spark of magic happened. Late yesterday while watching the Leafs beat out Tampa Bay, and after a full day of rest, I was struck by inspiration. Not sure why it always seems to come at the time when I was ready to head to bed, but I found myself frantically writing down thoughts and ideas about my business, about my life and about some projects I had on the back burner. Clarity had arrived.

Ahhh... right. Even though I had imagined that I would have more time to work on or even think about plans, projects, etc. the reality is that my mind and energy were occupied by the cancer journey. There was very little room for anything else. Yet, I still pushed without great results. I had lots of assumptions about what "should" transpire rather than surrendering to what was really happening. I was resistant to being in the here and now. I often battled between my wants and being fully present in the moment. Ahhh another great lesson thanks to the Pink Road. Oh I think Gabby Bernstein, Eckhart Tolle and Deepak and finally rubbing off on me! lol

So today, I will continue to nurture this bliss.

What's Next:

April 24 - 28: Daily "Rays of Sunshine"

April 26: Weekly Radiation Oncology Appointment

April 28: HEALTh Rehab Program. Every Friday!